Read The Damn Box...



NOT YOUR TYPICAL RETAIL CUSTOMERS

 
Retail customers seem to be the last people on earth that cannot read.  It's as if they were teleported from the 5th century and never had an English class in their lives.  95% of ALL retard questions I get asked (and ALL questions I get asked are of the RETARD nature) about any given product are easily answered ON THE PACKAGE!! 

"Yes sir, allow me to read the description on the box outloud to you to answer your questions."

IDIOTS.

It blows my mind every single day how stupid you people are.  During the summer this happens all the time with questions about plants in our nursery section:

RETARD: Excuse me, does this plant need a lot of water?
Me: Well every plant we sell has this large "PLANT INFORMATION" card cleverly hidden Right In Front Of You in the plant's container.  Let me go ahead and read it to you: "Keep soil moist, do not allow to dry out."
RETARD: Oh, so what should I do?

Me: My vast experience and multiple college degrees in the field of botany COMBINED WITH MY INCREDIBLE ABILITY TO READ would lead me to suggest that you, "Keep soil moist, do not allow to dry out."

RETARD: Oh, ok. Thanks!
Me: No problem! Have a nice day fucktard!

You bastards apparently think that a retail employee who hates his job (we all do) and gets paid just pennies above minimum wage is going to have expansive knowledge and experience involving all 40,000 or so products within the store.  You aren't just dumb, you have crossed the line into the realm of FULL RETARD.