Tuesday, June 7, 2011

We know you stole it

If there is one thing in this world worse than useless fucking morons, its thieves. The ones I am referring to are the ones that steal tons of stupid shit and then come back to return it. Who the fuck does that you may ask? Well I will tell you, every fucking cracked out piece of shit that steps in the door. One big fat she-Shamu in particular likes to shoplift frequently with her scumbag entourage. They come in and stuff their pockets and handbags full of shit and return often days, if not hours later to return it.

At this particular store we can only return items without a receipt to a merchandise card. This rude-ass fat lady has been told this every time. Yet every time she comes in she asks for cash and throws a tantrum every time she's told that we can't.  Instead of stealing on a regular basis, she should try thinking outside her enormous fat rolls and GET A FREAKIN' JOB.  But I suppose that someone who steals and tries to return product later that day isn't quite smart enough to flip burgers, although she probably eats 10-12 a day and wonders why she isn't losing weight.

Shoplifters who throw tantrums when they can't get cash back need to be chopped up into tiny pieces of fish bait.


  1. Are you boys taking another extended lunch break on COMPANY time? Looks like we'll have to dock your slave wages, write you both up, and assign you to restroom duty for 2 weeks. Now get back to your brilliance!

  2. I would honestly just tell those people to fuck off.
    Pure and simple