Public Service Announcement!!

Attention customers! You Are Not Funny!  I know you expect us to laugh when we hear you say, "Hey there's no price on this item so it must be free right?! HAA HAA," but we never do.  Maybe its because we hear that a couple dozen times every single day, and it was stupid the first time, but you twits think you're sooooo clever.

"OH DEAR GOD you are so FUCKING funny!!  I've NEVER heard THAT before! Yes sir!  All items without a price are free! Go take home a few SUVs with you from the parking lot since they don't have prices on them either!"  Do you go to garage sales and take everything without a clearly marked price?  Really? Fuck you.  Hop back on your electric wheelchair with the orange flag (that you don't need, you're just desperate for sympathy for being such an unoriginal retard), find a large body of water and see how well you float.

Morons.  What will you come up with next? "Why did the chicken cross the road?" You're as pathetic as an 80-year-old addicted to child porn.  Get a clue, or when in doubt as to your capability to be the slightest bit funny, just shut the fuck up. Work one day in retail and you will probably never speak again.

Another one I "love" hearing is, "Hey, you know if I buy this snow thrower it won't snow right??" HA. HA. Right, asshole. And if you buy a lawnmower your grass won't grow either.  And MAYBE if you buy a staple gun, that tiny flickering 2 watt light bulb in your nearly empty head will shine and you'll staple your lips shut so the world will be freed from your asinine ramblings.  But I doubt it.  You must go home being so proud of yourself for entertaining the retail workers, but we just look at you like rotten, walking, talking, bowls of excrement from 20 Indian cholera patients.


For every 300 customers that Try to be funny, just 1 of them is.  And usually it's the 80-year-old pervert saying sick shit about the "dumbest cunt-bitch in the universe" mentioned in this post, Stupid-Ass Managers.